Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Woeful Spotlight: Dr. Katherine Howard

What is the strangest thing I would find in your house right now?   

There are so many things in my house that might be considered odd by some and normal by others.  Why, just within a few feet of my desk you would find the following: a gnome mooning, Sigmund Freud bobble head, talking Yoda, Sigmund Freud action figure, and a psychology Magic 8-ball.  Oddest might be the little clear box that has tiny teeth in it.  These are the collections of the tooth fairy gathered from years of nighttime visits.  I don’t know why I collected them initially instead of throwing them away.  It has been years since any teeth have been added to the little box but the box has survived many clutter purges.  I do not think it has any connection to my membership in the Anthony Hopkins fan club – do you?  

Your story is about how your son embarrassed you.  What is one of the best pranks you played on your children? 

Ahhhh…where do I even begin?  I love April’s Fool Day and think it should be renamed “Ensuring Your Children will need Professional Counseling in the Future Day”.  I have tormented my children over the years and each memory brings a grin of pleasure.  One of my favorites is the “Fright Night Drive”.  My daughter (and favorite victim) was 14 and we were driving up to Wisconsin to visit friends.  Being a city kid, she was a little unnerved by the very dark isolated country road we were traveling on that evening.  She was talking about different scary movies she had seen and how they reminded her of the isolated road we were on.  We  crested a small hill and I could see that there was no traffic in front of us or behind us.  Unnoticed by her, I moved my hand over to the left side of the dashboard.  Without any warning, I slammed on the brakes and screamed, while simultaneously pushing in the headlight knob plunging the car into total darkness.  Needless-to-say, my daughter (and my sons innocently sitting the back seat), FREAKED out.  The bloodcurdling screams could have woken the dead.  Poor girl even lost some bladder control.  Meanwhile, I was laughing so hard I thought I might have a similar accident.  It took her a few hours to forgive me – my uncontrollable giggles each time I relived the moment didn’t help.  There was no lasting damage and within days she was begging me to pull it on her friends.  

Tell us about one time you stuck your foot in your mouth.  

Hmmm…this is a little harder question to answer.  I don’t tend to reveal things that shouldn’t be revealed.  I do recall one “oops” moment that I wished I could have put my foot in my mouth.  My daughter had announced that she was breaking up with her boyfriend after school.  Later that evening, I ran into him at the store and offered my condolences to him.  He just stared at me with a confused look on his face.  Yep, she had changed her mind during the school day and never said a word to him about breaking up.  The relationship didn’t last much longer and she still blames me for the breakup.  

Pimp yourself – what are your other business ventures?  Where can readers find your writing?  

I have a personal blog.  It combines the trials of my medical journey in the aftermath of stomach cancer with my somewhat subdued humor.  I am currently working on a collection of humorous parenting stories that also offer practical parenting survival suggestions.  Other writing ventures have been put on hold while I have had to concentrate on troublesome medical issues.  My interest in writing remains high and impromptu opportunities like “Mug of Woe” are welcome distractions.  I also have my own crochet business called Enviable Creations. 

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